• I’m Not Who I Once Was

    It’s probably the name of a country song, but it’s real life to me. In my early twenties, I was full of pride about my potential, which had been spoken over me by various people in my church. 

    But callings and purpose and potential only take you so far. Then comes the real life stuff… the work. The becoming. The doing something that actually matters instead of talking about it. 

    Somewhere along the way, I no longer believed that I would live up to my potential. This terrifying dark thought crept in on me like an icy dagger: “What if I die completely unknown to the world?”

    While that might not be the end of the world for some, the very idea of such insignificance strikes a note of devastating failure into the core of my being. If I have not impacted my planet, nor swayed the thinking of its men, what have I done all this time?