Culture

Do I really want to kill a deer? I mean, I’m not overly fond of venison. I’m not going to use the pelt. I WILL eat deer meat but more as both an obligation after killing and a practice for a self-reliant future.

I get to spend hours alone in Nature, which recharges my soul.

If I killed 2+ deer each year, how much money would I SAVE on meat?

If I buy all the gear most guys use to hunt, how much money will I LOSE on meat?

At some point, the gain has to exceed the expense. Otherwise I have a very expensive hobby. 

Why does it cost so much to do EVERYTHING? Land is expensive. Building a house is expensive. Owning chickens is expensive. Hunting is expensive. Farming is expensive. Grocery shopping is expensive. There has to be a line drawn where we decide to make due with minimal supplies or build our own accessories with minimal tools.

That's right, it's Wife Appreciation Wednesday, where we husbands give credit and thanks to the wonderful women in our lives. On this second day of 2008, I have every reason to brag on my wife.

Four days before Christmas, my wife went into labor. Because of her personal convictions about health and wellness, she chose to have a natural childbirth at home. No drugs. No surgeries. No inducing to speed up the process. Just a natural, allow the birth to happen type of situation. At 3:30am on Friday morning, Heather started feeling very strong birthing waves (a.k.a. "contractions"), and she woke me up at 4am to start timing them. For the first hour of record, they were 7 minutes apart. We were big-time excited! I started texting my family to start praying over the birth. Well, within an hour or two, the birthing waves spaced out 20+ minutes apart, and my wife was seriously disappointed. I did my very best to encourage her. 

She went through spurts of heavy birthing waves off and on for most of the day. It wasn't until 2am Saturday morning that our midwife and her assistant came to our house to monitor the progress. They were absolute angels, giving my wife encouragement and comfort much more easily than I could. They knew what was normal and what wasn't, so they could speak to her with authority and calm her fears and questions. 

We were making little progress throughout Saturday morning. Then we sent out another request to friends and family to pray that this would happen sooner than later. At 3pm, Heather took a warm shower to relax and loosen up her muscles. She came out a different person. She had her game face on, and was full of determination like I've never seen. She began pacing the house and lifting her belly properly to put the baby's head right on top of the cervix. She was a woman on a mission.  

I won't give you all the details because those are intimate and shared only with my wife, myself, our midwives, and our two mothers. But I will tell you that at 9:46pm on Saturday, our daughter Kathryn Taylor Dessinger was born. And my beautiful wife had endured 42 hours of labor! Let me tell you, I was exhausted and I didn't have to do anything but face worry and be her emotional support.

This woman faced something that almost no women in our society choose to face anymore, and she did it with great courage. I've told her since that I consider her resolve to birth our baby naturally was much more courageous and difficult than what women went through 300+ years ago. They had no choice but to have babies naturally. Anesthesia wasn't available except for opium-like substances. But my wife had every avenue of pain relief available and chose not take the easy road for the sake of her baby. 

And because we did not induce the birth, our baby was born a perfect 7lbs. 8oz. at 2 weeks past her due date! She was perfectly healthy and VERY alert when she was born, and breastfed as soon as we could let her. Kathryn has done very well thus far and we are very gushingly proud parents. But I give credit to my wife, who made choices and stood by them even when she wanted the drugs mid-way through.

Our baby will be healthier and happier because of her choices, and I am forever grateful for that. I always want my child to have the very best we can offer her, so that she has every opportunity to live a full life. She will make mistakes and learn from them, but she will be equipped to face life as well as we can possibly arrange. 

Thank you, Heather, for being my heroine and an example to many others as well! Your standards can be difficult to live up to, but you prove that most of them can be attained by anyone who makes a choice and keeps it. I love you.

******* 

If you're married and would like to brag on your wife, post a comment below and give her kudos for specific things you love about her. If you're single, you can post a comment shout out to your future wife and tell us what she's like.  

Now that Christmas has come and gone, our bellies are full of Christmas
delight, cookies, pies, turkey and so forth, family members and friends are
or will be soon making their  way back to their own homes and their regular
lives. As we prepare for the New Year what happens to the bonds that have
been re-kindled, made and established with new friends and old, family
members and loved ones a-like?

Do we? Will you maintain this attitude of generosity and appreciation,
charity and love, smiling, happiness and joy?  Helping around the house to
clean up, being nice to the kids, being tolerant of your family. Was that
just a facade? Or will you continue to be this person that you have been
over the holiday season?

The Christmas Holiday season is especially special because so many people
become selfless and do things for others rather than themselves. And so they
sort of become another person, a better person. A person that exhibits
patience, understanding and selflessness. Is there a reason why this has to
change, if not then why does it? Hmmmm?

Well the reasoning really is not important but the change is. Joy is a
wonderful thing and you can be joyous as often as you please. It is not
limited to any season or any reason. If you had fun and smiled a lot and
enjoyed friends and family, hold on to that joy, embrace it and let it
embrace you. Let the goodness that has come out of you this holiday season
remain with you always. There is something great about a person’s character
that exhibits, consideration, patience and selfless, because your actions
reflect that life is not always about you, and that….is a wonderful thing.

As the New Year approaches do not lose sight of what you have become, the
season is here now and will soon pass however your graciousness,
appreciation and respect for others does not have to pass with it.  Hold on
to who you have become, for all seasons. Do not let your humble spirit and
attitude fade as the season passes.

Your attitude is your outwardly appearance to the world. Be the best you for
all seasons and you will see how your attitude affects others in a positive
light. Let your good spirit shine from you like the sun and you will see
good things grow all around you. Seeds of joy will soon grow to flowers of
happiness and smiles.

Smiling is good we should smile as often as possible as if everyday was
Christmas. Don’t you think?

Happy Thursday!

It happened to me, just last week. One day I let my cat out the back door in the morning and he never came back. He was missing without a clue for four and a half days. My wife and I were heartbroken. I gave her this kitty on our first Valentine's Day as a married couple. He's been an integral part of our family for the past four years. 

Here's are the five steps we took to find our kitty which you should follow at a minimum:

1.  Post a LOST ad on your city's Craigslist.com page under both "lost & found" AND "pets". Volunteers for some animal shelters check Craigslist regularly to hopefully match found animals with their owners. Include a photo, description, and phone number. You may consider adding your address or cross streets. In our case, an animal shelter volunteer saw my ad on Craigslist and contacted someone at the shelter who in turn contacted me. 

2.  Create a flier with the same information. Make tons of copies (I made 120). Tape a flier on every door within 3-4 city blocks. Include telephone poles, light poles, below stop signs, etc. As you do this, talk to everyone personally that you see. Tell them your story and hand them a flier. People who make personal contact with your plight tend to go the extra mile to help out. 

3. Visit the local pound / animal shelter daily. Calling is a waste of time. In my case, one lady checked Mr. Kitty in on Thursday and another lady answered the phone when we called on Friday. She had no idea about our cat and told us she hadn't seen him. We could have had him the next day if we had gone to the shelter in person.

4. Check Craigslist, Petfinder.com, and your local newspaper ads online to check for a) anyone announcing that they've found your pet or b) anyone trying to sell or give away your pet. Some people might try to find a good home for your pet if they think it's a stray. They also might try to make a profit if your pet is an expensive or rare breed.

5. Pray. It works. Don't be afraid to ask God for what you really want. You won't always get everything, but he gives more when you ask than when you don't. "You have not because you ask not."

Best wishes to you and yours.