Blessed are the pure in heart,

for they shall see God.

I cannot tell you how much this passage has meant to me. It is a state of existence I have longed for and felt impossible to reach. How I long for a pure heart! I’m sick of being filthy. I’m weary of feeling shame over and over again. I want a pure heart, a clean conscience, and peace in my heart.

These are the things I experienced as a new Christian. Purity of heart was relative, of course. I felt completely new compared to the horrendous condition I was in the day before. But as time marches on, I had to face more and more of my heart’s condition, and I was sick with sadness.

Several times over the past ten years, people with words of knowledge have told me that I am like David in that I am a man after God’s own heart. I am still puzzling over the meaning of this, since both David and I have had our desperately wicked times.

Some say that being a man after God’s own heart means that you simply never give up the pursuit. Perhaps. I don’t feel so driven as I once did, though. That is part of the reason for this website. I need to reconnect. I need a deeper connection. I need to desire him more. And all of this begins with a renewed mind. You have to know what to think about God and your position with him before you can feel much of anything about it.

Then there’s that whole “they shall see God” bit. I’ve developed a theory or two on that verse over time. I’m actually just now going back to those and trying to deconstruct them. I don’t want to live on assumption. I don’t want to make decisions based on half-assed ideas either. I think I’ve missed out on more than enough already due to those silly assumptions.

How shall they see him? Will they see him face to face, like Moses? Will they see him as in have intimacy with him? Will they have revelation of him? What will they see?

I have no exact answer, but the questions are worth asking.

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