• all for you

    i crush my cigarette in the ash tray one last time
    one last time i feel the sweet heavy burden on my chest
    we weren’t meant to live forever, i heard someone say
    steel resolve pulses through my veins
    i may not live forever…

    …but i won’t leave her to face it all alone

    it’s all for you, i cry with silent tears
    to meet your needs and ease your fears
    a child inside breaks
    the strain of too much reality
    i never asked to be born, he whispers painfully
    i did not ask for this…

    …i stand silently and awkwardly
    allowing the moment of weakness to pass
    before changing the subject to ease the tension

    it’s not that truth is so bad… no… not really
    it’s that lies are so much more comfortable
    it’s that life is hard enough when you’re keeping track of lies
    even without adding the burden of truth

    in the background, a child’s cry can still be heard
    softly now, rhythmic like a rocking chair
    gently caressing and soothing itself with misery

    it’s all for you, i heard her say
    i’m waiting, softly waiting,
    hoping you will make it to me
    hoping for what could and will be